second pregnancy musings

jack is napping and it's snowing. this gives me time to sit and muse for a little while about things, and i've come to some conclusions about subsequent pregnancies. i've been trying to focus more on this pregnancy lately, since i feel i did little else during the first, and this one has been more of an afterthought. it always bothered me when friends would make comments that they kept first year calendars for their first borns, and paid close attention to sterilizing bottles and such for those first kids, but when second or third children came along they didn't bother. i had always told myself that i would try hard to make sure each child of ours got equal attention, got plenty of photos taken of him/her, and never got short-changed for being a subsequent child. i've come to realize during this pregnancy, though, that it's going to be harder than i had hoped. i have less time to revel in the joy of being pregnant or think too much about the coming baby simply by virtue of the fact that jack takes up most of my time and energy. for this reason the pregnancy is flying by and i feel at times like i'm missing it in some ways. most of the time that i do spend thinking about the new baby's arrival is focused less on the anticipation of what he or she will be like, and more on how we will survive with juggling two kids under two. a lot of things change from the first kid to the second. for example, the wish list. for my first pregnancy, we set up two registries with an infinite number of baby gear "essentials" to make jack comfortable and happy. it was about cute outfits, cozy infant seats, and trendy diaper bags. as we compile the list of wants and needs for baby #2, we realize that the things on it are no longer baby-centered as with jack, but they are now parent-centered: gift certificates for take and bake meals, cleaning service, dog-walking service, larger and more practical diaper bags (that can handle packing cloth dipes for 2 kids, sippy cups, bottles, changes of clothes, cheerios.... we may have to start toting around a suitcase.) i think with our first pregnancy, everything was exciting, and the anticipation was more of bliss than of worry. with the second, we are in some sort of survival mode; anticipating with both pleasure and anxiety. i'm sure everyone goes through this, and just learns to manage. i keep thinking, "what am i going to do when mike returns to work after those first 2 weeks of leave?" it will definitely be an exercise in multi-tasking. until then, i'm still making as many plans as possible to do all the things for this baby that i did for jack. i have a baby book and a first year calendar, and within both i've already entered some information. i'm going to be sure that this baby gets some photos alone for his/her baby book, rather than always having joint photos with jack. i'm going to try and be good about photos of milestones, etc. i'm sure it will be a learning experience!