Mother of Denial

I'm sitting here at the computer, in the basement, as far away from my toddler's room as I can get, so that I can attempt to tune out his singing, door banging, and chatting. I'm pretending that he's sleeping, as he used to do so nicely during naptime. This is day 4 on the no-nap trail, and it makes somewhere around 7 out of 10 days that he has chosen to skip his regular, 2 hour afternoon naptime. I have plenty of excuses for why he hasn't been napping...busy day, too overtired; slow day, not in need of more rest; excited about grandparents coming. I'm in a state of denial about the possible reason for all this, which I will continue to refuse to accept: that he's reached an age where he is ready to give up naps altogether. Nope, huh-uh, not happening. We've got to at least make it to three. Besides, he needs that time to refuel and regroup and take time out. Yes. That's it. {What I'm really thinking is "NO NO NO NO-- *I'm* not ready yet."} As any parent knows, naptime is sacred time. More often than not, it's the only time I get to catch up on dishes, laundry, peeing, eating, prepping things for when he wakes up, feeding Benjamin...not to mention email, or anything else I would like to actually do with my day (gasp).

Some parents agree to forgo naps as long as their child agrees to "quiet" time. I imagine this works much better for the 3-4 yr-old range, where you can actually negotiate and explain quiet time. My 27-month-old only understands "I play trains!" and "Baby, wake up!" I'd like to say I'm okay with him singing and banging around in his room upstairs, so long as I'm toddler-free for an hour or so. But I'm not. That two hours of silence is an absolute necessity to my peace of mind; I just can't truly check-out or relax (or get child #2 to sleep) with "Mary had a Little Lamb" being yelled on the monitor, or "MAMA!!!!" being banged out on the door. So I'm going to try to pretend a little longer that he's sleeping. And I hope he begins to do so again, regularly.

I hope everyone's Thanksgiving holidays were delightful, full of yummy food and few family squabbles. We are 2 down, 1 to go for our Thanksgiving line-up. Luckily tomorrow's Tgiving is with my brother and his girlfriend, and we have agreed NO TURKEY. After cooking a 9.5 lb one today, I'm ready to be done with turkey for another year. My parents came today and we played many a rousing game of Wii sports. Good times.

Wii. My Christmas present from Mike, a month early. One could argue that it's slightly more a Christmas present for Mike from himself, but potato, potat-to. Actually, my portion of the gift-- a Wii Fit-- was purchased yesterday, so it's awaiting my ever-needing-of-exercise-body to start it up and figure it out. I will admit that it's fun to have around when we have people over, and can do team games. But on a daily basis, fitting Wii into an already low-free time schedule is nearly impossible. It will be fun to have around, but the more techno our house gets the more I want to check out and read a book. I'm thinking that for my next birthday I may request a week of technology-free living. Where we actually talk at night instead of watch t.v., play with the kids instead of check email or Facebook, play cards after Jack goes to bed instead of play Wii. Call my crazy, but when we were living in Puerto Rico at the time of Tropical Storm Jeanne, and lost electricity for a week (and we were the lucky ones), I found a silver lining. Despite not being able to shower or cook (or enjoy air conditioning), I really enjoyed that time of playing poker and chess by candlelight each night, without the murmur of the t.v. or the computer or any other appliance to compete with.

Tropical Storm Jeanne, September 15, 2004


Candle-lit poker


Camera flash gives us more light than anything!

Back to 2008. I'm finding less and less time to focus on my dissertation with holiday planning and other such things coming up more often. I'm starting to freak out. One year to go.... On the bright side, I finished coding all my PR interviews. I'm ready to get to the writing, at least to finish up the chapter that's focused on the PR stuff. Once I get into the writing, hopefully this week, I hope to feel more optimistic. I can't believe December is just a couple days off.... Benjamin is gearing up for his first holiday season:


We try to get outside during these 50 degree days, but on the colder days we are stuck looking for things to do. Cold weather dress-up was on the schedule the other day, and Bapa helped:


Grandma's boots:


Ahhh...both kids seem to be napping. I think I'll have a slice of pie and some coffee and enjoy the peace and quiet. For now.